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Seek_ye_first
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Country: United States
State: Texas
Birthday: 8/26/1984
Gender: Female
Interests: Horse-back riding (not stupid trail riding), hanging out, TRAVELING, learning things that are interesting to me, laughing, witnessing, and just driving in my Cavalier while singing.
Expertise: Serving, fixing other peoples problems, can relate to almost anyone, debating (be careful), counseling, teaching, falling short of expectations and yet coming out smiling.
Message: message me
Yahoo:  Baptistbeauty18
Member Since:
11/11/2003
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| I thought I might post a little something since its been two months shy of a year since my last entry. I am working as a Nanny for a four month old baby boy and I am loving it. Today I had to watch his brother b/c he was sick and it was a little harder, but not too bad. I have watched as many as six kids at once before. I have a wonderful boyfriend here in Texas that I am madly in love with. I see us having a future together, but time will tell. Life is pretty peachy. I am working on my music and trying to write more songs so I can have an official repitoire. I would really like to hit it hard after I write some more songs and start getting my name and face out there. My new site RileyJames is supposed to be dedicated to my music aspirations, but lately I have just been writing whats going on with me. That was the name I had picked out for my country music career, but I may go with Jenny Lee instead, because its more of my natural name. Well, that's enough for now. Peace out and God bless ya! | | |
| Happy Birthday to me! On August 26 I turned 20 years old! The big 2-0! Well, I can tell you it sucks to be at an age where you aren't a teenager anymore, but you aren't quite adult enough to get into certain places or to buy certain beverages. Well it's a year of my life I am going to try to enjoy. I can't wait to see what makes this year memorable. I liked being 19. So many memories. Such a coming of age age, if that makes sense. Or at least it was for me. I put my foot down with my father and moved out. I am paying for my own college, car, insurance, and expenses. I know what I want to do and I am willing to work hard to get to it. Oh, come and visit my new site all about my career goal. RileyJames is the new xanga name. | | |
| Wow! I look at my old entry and realize how that is over. I mean, I still feel the same fear of settling down. Can anyone tell me, why is it that I am questioning the vow of purity that I have made in my life? I have been raised and fed all my life of keeping pure and waiting for marriage. I never felt the need to question it until now. I never had a reason to, until now. Are there certain degrees of purity? Can a person do other things and still remain pure and a virgin? The people who know me might think this completely out of the blue when they read this. Please, don't. I want to wait until I am married to have sex, I really do. But how far do you go? Gosh! Part of me doesn't even know what the heck I am talking about. I am pretty innocent in this department. It's never beeen an issue until now. | | |
| Gosh! You know, I swore to myself I would never be like those girls who obsess about guys or the guy they are dating. But here I am unable to get it off of my mind. Do I miss him? I think so. I guess I am just scared. I realized that tonight. I am scared of commitment. (That sounds so corny) But not just with a relationship, but with life itself. My biggest fear in life is to be normal. To settle down and live in the same place with my husband and to have kids and raise them and go back and forth to some job all of my life. That is what most girls dream about having. Frankly, it scares the shit out of me... | | |
| Okay, so update. I have been promoted in my job. I am now an official Gap Sales Coach. And I get a raise. I am able to train other employee's and take on more responsibility. I feel that I am at my best when in a leadership role. Not that I can't be a good team worker, but I just am a great team leader. Anyways, I am lovin' it!
So with this guy...I haven't kissed him. In fact, I told him today that I am just not ready to be in a relationship. I have never been in one and I thought I was ready, but I am not. And I said that I didn't think it was fair to him for me to continue down this path when I was so unsure and not ready. He looked so sad. Like he was going to cry. I feel so bad. He still wants to be friends and hang out and he said if I change my mind that I can tell him anytime. He asked if he had done something wrong and I said no, that he had been a perfect gentleman, but I just want to wait until I am a little more steady and settled before I enter a serious relationship. I feel like the worst person on the face of the earth! I can't even imagine what it must be like on the recieving end! And I never want to know. I can't tell right now if I feel bad because I hurt him or because I regret breaking it off... | | |
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